Breaking The Cycle

Yesterday no one could escape the poignancy of it, it was about the victims of 11th September 2001, the 10th anniversary after their tragic deaths and the beginning of the 'war on terror'. Watching the commemorative ceremonies was not very easy, not easy because many were still in deep pain and you could personify their own continuing grief. I identified with them and could appreciate where they were coming from but I would hope that 10 years from the (my) loss of my twin I would cope much better.

I am sure many would have moved on in some way, married and built a family, but there were simply some who were struggling and I wondered why? From what I am going through I feel the reason lies in how you deal with your loss in the beginning, how others support you and above all your faith in the Lord Jesus Christ.

I believe all this gives shape and hope to one's future after a tragic loss. Faith in Christ, because that is something positive to focus on. I am learning from my mother's experience when she lost my father at a early age, (she was 30) she simply focused on us, the children, and that is what kept her going through the raw pain and grief.

When my twin died, for almost a week or more I actually could not sleep, yes power naps here and there, but not really sleeping through the night, its better now, but there are many days I do not really sleep and simply lay just thinking. You know, not one day has passed without my thought of her, yet, I must cope for the sake of the most important people in my life, my wife of course and my two beautiful daughters, I must cope because of the wonderful children she left behind, I must cope because of the incredibly friendship I have built with her husband, my brother-in-law.

Thank God because it is through him alone that I will cope. Thank you for the many who have continue to follow me, may God bless you all.