With Tears Streaming Down My Eyes….

With tears streaming down my eyes, with an intense sadness and a deep sense of loss, a loss among losses I watched and processed the documentary 'The lost twins of the Twin Towers'. I viewed it together with my wife, hoping that it will help us understand the journey I am making and need to make in the months to come. My mood is still one that craves isolation to create space to process my thoughts.

But I must say, it helped me to know that I am not alone in this sense of grief at this time. I discovered that it is by opening up and finding a support group that the twins of Twin Towers have learnt to cope with their 'loss among losses'

With time I have promised my twin that I will collate all this thoughts into a book and publish it to help others going through or coping with grief.

Rev Rach, my friend told me about a book by C S Lewis, 'A Grief Observed', she has promised to get a copy of it and lend it to me. Very thoughtful of her I thought, but then, I think, smiling 'she is a vicar'. My friend from Scotland also called, she is a gift from above, she wanted to know how I was and I told me about another programme on Radio 4 about grief of a twin.

As I write am listening to 'What a friend we have in Jesus', it is a comforting hymn and the full song goes like this:

"What a friend we have in Jesus,
all our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry
everything to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit,
O what needless pain we bear,
all because we do not carry
everything to God in prayer.

Have we trials and temptations?
Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged;
take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful
who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness;
take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy laden,
cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge;
take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do thy friends despise, forsake thee?
Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In his arms he'll take and shield thee;
thou wilt find a solace there."

I hope this hymn comforts you today and in the years to come.