The Lone Twin Network Annual Meeting

Yesterday was the annual meeting of the Lone Twin Network and I was fortunate enough that it was in Nottingham near where I live.

The previous night I really did not sleep, I am not sure whether it was anxiety or nerves, but the meeting was good. Yes there was the business and formal side which I cared less for but I certainly enjoyed supporting, sharing and speaking to people who understood how profound our lost is and how it continues to affect us.

How can a non twin understand the profundity of our loss? They simply expect us to move on, the concept of being together in the womb with another for 9 months and then experiencing loss is not something they can appreciate. Many equate it with the loss of a sibling or another relative, but from my experience, it is and cannot be equated.

I have learnt to arrive at a healthy accommodation for things I do not understand rather than impose my own perspective on a situation. In a similar vein I appeal to relatives, friends and colleagues out there who cannot comprehend the loss of a twin or its concept, to provide me and other twins they know the same level of accommodation they would wish for themselves. Simply saying move on or get over it about something you are unable to appreciate or understand is insensitive and unkind. You can, I suggest, better help me or your lone twin friend by learning more about what it is to be a lone twin.

I am in a much better place now, but profoundly affected on so many levels by my loss and I will never allow that to be dismissed so lightly.

I ended yesterday, by joining Lisa, David, Aavon, Julia, Lucy, Nancy and Patricia for a meal, and as always the bond was so strong and so re-assuring. Today, I wish to salute those who set up the Network and who organised yesterday's event, I thank you!