The Laziness of Grief

A friend of mine has happily provided me with details of a twins' network in UK which has a website on:

http://www.lonetwinnetwork.org.uk/index.htm

I intend to be part of it and use it as a way into something much more positive, much more fruitful.

According to C S Lewis, speaking from his own experience, there is a laziness to grief, he says:

"I loathe the slightest effort. Not only writing but even reading a letter is too much. Even shaving. What does it matter now whether my cheek is rough or smooth…… Meanwhile, where is God? This is one of the most disquieting symptoms."

I recognise this but the reassuring thing is that I do not blame God for the loss of my twin to the ravages of cancer, yes I feel bereft and not knowing where to turn sometimes but certainly still have a strong sense that God will use the people around me to bring me out of this in a stronger and more fulfilling way.

I quote C S Lewis again, who states:

"It is hard to have patience with people who say 'There is no death' or 'Death doesn't matter'. There is death. And whatever is matters. And whatever happens has consequences, and it and they are irrevocable and irreversible.."

Thank God, however, that death to us can matter in a good way when we are sure of the final destination of our loved one. That Folashade is in heaven is in no doubt, that it is and should be an encouragement and a spur to action is what am working on.